An excerpt from our not-so-weekly news channel ‘nanguys [at] yahoogroups’
Author
Aditya
ok, so i had earnestly told bird in december that if/when i come back for good to nandanvan, i’ll run for the secretary’s position (i was pissed off that kids arent allowed to play anywhere). yesterday i was chatting with bird, and i told him that the secretary has 2-4 years in his position before i come back and depose him.
bird then says that he’ll run for the secretary’s seat too (thus insulting the position of secretary). if any of the other nanguys will run for secretary in the future,
please let me know so i can make plans accordingly (read- make them sleep
with the fishes).
HAIL NANDANVAN!
– best, the senti nangaa
In reply …
Author
Apoorva aka popeye
Bird gets my vote. He is a true swadeshi…. I say Bird should be
secretary!! Right now! It can bring up some interesting scenarios tho
We need an opposition party. So if Bird is secy, Bakshi goes into opposition… like the repubs and democrats. Vice versa! Its an interesting scenario wrt who is in power. If its bird, who likes silence, he will bring a stop on shouting from the front to call people. Also he might allow happy & Wills factory to open a chain in the garage. Bakshi will oppose! While Bakshi will bring a stop on smoke and booze! Only Mangola allowed in Nandanvan. bird will oppose.
Actually we have many posts in the future up for grabs.
Abbs – Director of IT services – nandanvan (hopefully by 2030 we will have internet in all houses).
Tak: Take care of the finances. CA kab kaam main aayegaa?
Farro: Advertisements/PR which draw sponsors (such as cafe coffee day) & chicks (much wanted) into nandanvan.
Beamer & Mask: Nandanvan will have its own supply of man-made combustible gas for our cooking needs!
Pals: Security! And of course… Nandanvans spiritual preacher. Everyone has to chant some mantra and only then will they be allowed in walk in or out of the building by security!
Anna: Nandanvan DBA by day! Pimp by night. If Farro cant draw in chicks by the day, Anna will provide them by the night!
Me: ?
Suggestions anyone? Cant wait to hear them!
I thought there were more Nanguys…. did I miss out on anyone? I am growing old. Ok, enuff pakaoing.
Bird, go for the secy position right now I say…. the power of now!!!
In reply …
Author
Me
I vouch for Bird to be our zone’s next ‘Caarporater’. Our building’s too small and has far too non-tactical issues for bird to fritter away his ‘precious’ time. Else, my vote would be Adit (if no one else stands in).
One would also consider the following scenarios where each undersigned member of our cult decides to go swades (pronounced “swa ‘pause’ daysh”) and stands in for the secy. post in Nandanvan; the following marks out their years of experience and could help their future use of slogans.
Anna
Headup: Peace to all
Writeup: 20+ years of preaching goodwill and fathoming the essence of nandanvankind. He’s our man … He’s our Anna. Anna has been our anna-daata, our mother, our father, our god-sent saint. His powers are known only to the group though, and He often tries to hide His identity from the ‘others’ by showing a completely different Self. During troubled times, He runs away to His place of wisdom (we think under His bed) to pray to the wise ones and ask for forgiveness … for His friends have sinned. We’ve mistaken it to be acts of cowardice, but it is His power to forgive and make the gods do so too that really stands out (and often gets us out of trouble).
Slogan: Hail Anna (often compared with the mighty Gayatri Mantra)
Apoorva
Headup: I stand alone (Godsmack – OST Scorpion King) [note: there’s very lil hair headup]
Writeup: Over 20 years of standing up to the likes of (late) Mr. Dsouza, Mrs. Dsouza, The Khandwaalas (a cult – specialized in areas of child-labour viz. – making lil’ kids fill buckets of water and assume that transport & logistics support comes free of cost, scaring not-so-innocent grownups by staring at them with evil eyes, wearing half-a-saree and running in and out of our building … amongst a host of other havoc habits), The Shahs (including our famous one-legged streaker) and lots more …
Slogan: He’s our uncontrollable weeny … stands up to everything … vote for our marcus erectus … vote for popeye
Dada
Headup: Deviant Art of Controllable Fission
Writeup: 20+ years of hardcore experience in the art of war, with unconventional weapons of mass destruction. But over the years, Dada has reached silent seas and he’s entirely devoted his time and effort on constructive usages of this (previously thought) uncontrollable power. As popeye mentioned, man made cooking gas is already in beta stages. Another wide area of research currently in progress although hush-hush for the ‘others’ is that of unlimited power supply. With this area of forte, Dada’s stand for the secy. could indeed prove to be a mighty one.
Slogan: The rifle itself has no moral stature, since it has no will of its own. Naturally, it may be used by evil men for evil purposes, but there are more good men than evil, and while the latter cannot be persuaded to the path of righteousness by propaganda, they can certainly be corrected by good men with rifles. (you can choose to replace ‘rifles’ with anything you wish)
Don’t forget to watch the rest of the gang (Bird, Adit, Farro, Mask, Tak, Pals) in our next show of “Nandanvan – Head of state” only on ‘nanguys [at] yahoogroups’.